My Grandmother & Myself
Isolated and alone my grandmother sits. Not only isolated by the walls
of the nursing home where she resides, but also Isolated from her surroundings
by the walls in her mind. She sits alone staring off into space, taking
no notice of anything or anyone. When left alone she makes no noise, just
sits there, as if deep in thought. She is hunched over in her chair with
her hands resting on the metallic restraint bar which keeps her from moving.
The mussels in her face are slack, showing no emotion. Nobody knows what
she is thinking, but I know she is thinking of something. Perhaps it is
of her family.
Before Alzheimer's disease overcame my grandmother the most important thing
to her was her family. While the months passed between holidays she would
spend her time writing postcards, buying presents, and preparing her house.
The happiest I ever saw her was when I was in the eighth grade. My family
had driven to my grandparents house for Christmas. Everyone was in the living
room, waiting for our grandmother to start handing out presents, as she
knelt next to the tree. On her head was a red cap with silver bells. She
was full of vibrancy as every inch of her face seemed to be tightened into
one big smile. She then handed the first present my cousin saying, "Here
you are Jim."
I also sit alone in my room, my hands folded in my lap, reading a book.
I am tired of the monotonous page turning that comes with reading my business
text. Absorbed in my academic material, and sheltered by the Campus boundaries
I have little knowledge of what is going on in the outside world, for I
have no television, radio or newspaper. Yesterday I heard the US sent air
strikes against Iraq, an event which occurred two weeks ago. Before I came
to school I use to love to follow New England sports teams, such as the
Red Sox and Patriots. Since I came here I have not heard them mentioned.
I sometimes get distracted and start thinking of other things, usually it
is of my brother. For the past sixteen years of my life my life I have seen
David almost every day. As I advanced through high school our relationship
strengthened and we became close friends. I trust my brother and feel grateful
I have someone close to my age that I can confide in.
Both my grandmother and I are institutionalized. Isolated in our respective
ways from both the outside world and our families, we have little knowledge
of what is going on around us. We are oblivious to such events as a baseball
game, or a war. Everyday occurrences such as seeing and being with our loved
ones have become memories, and in the case of my grandmother, faded ones
at best. The difference is that I have the option of becoming aware of these
things, and eventually through time I will learn about what happened. She
does not have this luxury and will stay in the dark for the rest of her
life.